To Think Beyond Limitations

by Lakshmie Napagoda, RGS

Congregation of Our Lady of Charity of the Good Shepherd (Good Shepherd Sisters) and

Member of Collaborative Leadership Development Program (CLDP) Cohort 10

Growing up in a small village in Sri Lanka, my life was shaped by challenges and responsibilities. My parents divorced when I was three years old, and my mother lost custody of her children. My father stopped taking us to visit our mother and did everything he could to prevent us from knowing where she was or when we would see her again. He remarried, had more children, and I became the oldest of seven siblings. I was forced into a caretaker role, responsible for my younger siblings and the household.  

The school became my refuge from the responsibilities at home. It was a place where I could escape the weight of my daily duties and, more importantly, from where I experienced kindness from a few of my teachers. My neighbors were poor, but they extended generosity in ways that taught me about the value of compassion, regardless of the circumstances. These small acts of kindness opened my eyes to a different way of thinking and believing - one not bound by the expectations of my family or the culture.  

Even as a child, I felt a persistent sense of unease. There was a nagging voice in me, quietly insisting that there was more to life than simply adhering to the family and cultural expectations. Alongside this inner restlessness was a small but powerful dream—one day, I will be with my mother again. This hope, though faint, gave me a reason to believe that life held possibilities beyond the life I knew. When I finally reunited with my mother, who worked hard to bring us to the States, my world expanded in ways I hadn’t anticipated. The joy of reuniting with my mother was mixed with cultural shock, which meant learning a new language, adjusting to a new culture, and understanding a different kind of love and perseverance. My mother, who introduced me to the Catholic Church, became a figure who helped me challenge the beliefs I had grown up with and pushed me to think differently about my potential and what my future could hold. 

Another pivotal moment in my journey was meeting the Sisters of the Good Shepherd (RGS). Their work with women and children at a shelter in Los Angeles introduced me to the spirit of St. Mary Euphrasia, the foundress of RGS. These Sisters lived lives dedicated to service, love, and compassion, showing me that there was another way to live and think beyond the cultural expectations of getting married and raising children.  

Looking back, I realize that many factors influenced me to think differently: the family dynamics I grew up in, the kindness I encountered along the way, the opportunities I was given to serve, and the compassion I witnessed through others. These experiences, though difficult at times, gave me the strength to believe that life held more for me than I had been led to expect. They taught me to question, to hope, to believe, and to think beyond the limitations of my upbringing.